How to overcome ‘kuuki yomenai’

When it comes to business and communication across cultural borders, Erin Meyer is probably the most experienced expert worldwide. The author of ‘The Culture Map: breaking through the invisible boundaries of global business’ teaches at INSEAD management school in Fontainebleau. Erin was an acclaimed guest speaker at Hager Group Symposium 2014.

Erin Meyer:

“

1 The sad truth is that the vast majority of managers who conduct business internationally have little understanding about how culture is impacting their work. They assume their actions and communication will be perceived as if the person was from their own culture or context. It is exactly these types of assumptions that lead to dramatic misunderstandings, projects failing and lost deals.

2 If, for example, someone is silent on the phone for a few seconds, in our western culture people would assume that this person hasn’t completely understood the meaning or feels uncomfortable with it. But especially in Asian cultures, silence suggests something positive. In fact, it might mean ‘I really admire your question, which deserves some time of preparation before spitting out an answer.’ So in an international context, it’s easier than ever before to fall into misconception traps, if you don’t listen carefully.

3 There’s this expression in Japanese called ‘kuuki yomenai’, shortened to KY, meaning that someone is unable to read the atmosphere. To be a good communicator means that you are able to pick up all the subtle messages in the air. And KY is, of course, much more difficult in a culture that is not your own.

4 The essential prerequisite for doing business is trust. But in different parts of the world there are completely different ways of building trust. Especially in western countries we tend to follow the concept of cognitive trust by trusting a person who is on time, who is reliable and seems to do good work. In the Middle East, China, Latin America and most African countries, there’s much more emphasis on the so-called affective or personal trust. People there tend to trust others with whom they feel they have a personal bond or emotional connection.

5  A simple consequence results. In countries with cognitive trust, e-mail might be very practical tool for doing business. But in countries where trust is built up emotionally, at least at the beginning you need a chance to build up a personal and emotional connection. Otherwise your e-mails will lead to nothing but failure.

6 Recently I experienced a striking example for the dramatic consequences of mis-communication. As you know, in countries like Germany or the US it’s very natural after a phone call to recap what has been said or agreed upon in an e-mail. For us, this shows that you are professional and on the ball. But when an US client of mine did this while working with a potential partner in Saudi Arabia on a multi-million dollar deal, it resulted in the deal imploding. His Saudi Arabian partner had the feeling that he was seen as not being trustworthy, felt insulted and cancelled the negotiations.

7 You should never forget that we are humans. So if somebody feels insulted, he reacts.

As someone who was born in Minnesota, married a Frenchman and lives in France, cultural misunderstandings are a common phenomenon for Erin Meyer.

8 There’s a famous saying by Paul Watzlawick that ‘one cannot not communicate’, meaning that every form of behaviour is a form of communication. We all send out unintended messages that are picked up by somebody who interprets it in his or her way. Even if you sit still and say nothing, you are communicating a very powerful message.

9 Does it avoid misunderstandings if you have a common language or even culture? Interestingly not. In fact, common language leads to the illusion of knowing what the other is saying and intending, while exactly the opposite is true.

Research shows that the highest expat failure rates in the world are not between Americans moving to China or French moving to Korea but between US Americans moving to the United Kingdom. There are also high failure rates among Germans moving to Austria and Spanish people going to Mexico. Speaking the same language leads to the belief that you are from the same tribe which means that you do not need to listen carefully anyway. At least you think you don’t. But it won’t take long before you find out.

10 There are a few crucial questions that every company like the Hager Group has to answer when growing internationally: How much is the company culture in line with the local culture of its new markets? And how flexibly does the company want to adapt to these local environments? Should we keep a very strong corporate culture to work most efficiently amongst themselves or should we take up local cultures?

11 If your company’s goal is to listen deeply to your customers, it might be better to have a flexible, adaptive corporate culture. But if you have a highly innovative spirit and want to keep the innovative spirit that created this product, then a strong corporate culture might probably be best.

Companies like Google have a very strong corporate culture and hire only people with a personality close to theirs that they call Googlers. Whereas this has internal advantages for the company, it might pose added challenges as this company might find it harder to listen to local customers.

12 The good news is: listening is something that definitely everybody can learn. The first and most important thing is that no matter where you are from and where you are, you should never start communication with the thought that you know the answer already. We so often think that we know what the person is going to say, and as a consequence, we do not listen deeply.

”